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On Writing; Inspired by Erma Bombeck
“I’ve taken my typewriter to the hospital with me for kidney infections. I have taken it on camping trips, and the sand has gotten in the keys. It is just like the most fierce habit you can imagine. It is there, and it stares at you like a conscience.” ~ Erma Bombeck I must write. Read more
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The Mystery in the Cook Book
I pulled the book off the shelves that looked most promising for a real recipe for rough puff pastry. The Great British Baking Show offered more inspiration than information, and Wolfgang Puck’s book looked more promising than most on the St. Albans library shelves. The book held that exquisite new book smell to it, and Read more
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Teachers’ Kids
“Out, out brief candle,” I said. “Shakespeare is so antiquated. They’re taking him out of the schools now. He’s irrelevant,” said Nick. My son was six. “Can you tell a story in a thousand words or less in iambic pentameter? I didn’t think so.” “Just tell me a bedtime story,” he said. “It was a Read more
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Black Licorice
“Which house shall we hit next, the brick one or that long white one with just the porch light on?” The Bunny Sisters collaborated. Trick or Treat was a serious matter. It had to be done in the most efficient and interesting of ways. Their costumes were fashioned of dresses from the thirties and their Read more
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An Unlikely Account of Lincoln’s Tophat
Not many people knew of Mercucio Sibedow, haberdasher to the presidency. Mercucio grew up south of the Mason Dixon line. He learned from his daddy how to make hats and ties, leather gloves, fashion mens finishing touches. You’d think that finishing touches were woman’s work, but that would be absolutely not true. In the world Read more
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How to hide a genius
As a society, we paint the most malformed picture we can grumble about. We tangle our thoughts in knots of despair so tight we can’t move from one group to the next without dire consequences. Once you move, there’s no going back, especially if you’ve moved “down.” Shunning is done with silent delight. Open, honest, Read more
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The Teacher
Ode to a Teacher Hammat. John Charles Hammat. Unconventional teacher of the universe died last month. Taught for four years, my four years, enough to get one class through, and quit to clean houses and live however he chose. He’d had enough of public schools. He taught Drama and English, but I only had him…
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Didactic
“Didactic,” something that teaches a lesson. I’ve said that “didactic,” was my favorite word for years. and there are people who will verify this. I’ve been a teacher forever, I can only deny so many things. I just looked up a bunch of synonyms for it in Thesaurus.com… Academic, pedantic, homelitic, moralizing, pedagogic, schoolmasterist, why…
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Grateful Right Now
Right this very minute I am most grateful for my freedom. It makes me glad I signed up to be a teacher. Summer makes the stress of the stupidity I put up with for seven and a half months a year worth it. I schedule important events on my summer calendar. If it doesn’t get…
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Avenue of the Olive Trees
Avenue of the Olive Trees, Henri Matisse “The shadows are ripe,” she said, and one floated across her face. The clouds were out, tap dancing back and forth between the leaves and branches and the sun. True. They were dark and deep big green shadows on the ground from the ancient limbs, Giant, strong, and…
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Rumors
While it’s true that a whole lot of rumors are made up on the spot, some of them are as true as they can be. This time of year always causes me to think about the kids I’ve heard about after they graduate. I taught middle school. Those kids don’t come back, not many anyway.…

