athesaurus.com

…breathe deeply and often…

  • Local Pizza

    Local Pizza I’m lucky. I live in small town West Virginia and a half a mile from a glorious, honest to God Italian pizza parlor, Larobi’s Pizza. The only Italian place this side of Ona that’s not a chain. Larobi’s takes cash and they don’t deliver. Their dining room is almost as good as their…

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  • If I’m alive

    If I’m alive… In twenty years, If I’m still alive I hope to hell I finally graduated from school. Kids have always liked me, not the other way round. This is the last twenty. Fix it. Admit it, I’m sick of kids.  I’ll publish the definitive legend of how the Scottish play got its curse…

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  • Ten Mile Light

    “Out, out brief candle,” I said. “Shakespeare is so antiquated. They’re taking him out of the schools now. He’s irrelevant,” said Nick. My son was six. “Can you tell a story in a thousand words or less in iambic pentameter? I didn’t think so.”  “Just tell me a bedtime story,” he said. “It was a…

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  • Adult Kids

    Adult Children A nurse in the doctor’s office ran me out of the room when the twins got their vaccinations to start school. They started crying the minute Dr. Brick said, “You know I would never do anything that would hurt without telling you.” They got five shots. Two in one leg, three in the…

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  • Flash and Trash

    When Mom died, I became keeper of the jewelry box. I dole out the contents to the various family members before I die. It’s not the standard little white padded jewelry box with the little gold lock and filigree. It’s the Chrysler Building of all jewelry boxes. Its contents are extraordinary. The most valuable commercial…

    Read more

  • Famous Diner

    Famous Diner I didn’t think Shakespeare would show up for dinner, not the real one anyway. He’d been dead for four hundred and six years. My research for a novel featuring the bard had me making a basic English roast dinner, including a bad Yorkshire pudding. Those things are tricky. When I make them, they…

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  • Intro…

    “It’s jacked up. Nobody consulted me about a standard damned poodle coming into this house. Life was just fine. It’s jacked up as shit,” said Norris. He stomped in a circle and thumped his tail before he could compose himself to continue. He was too damned mad. Norris was without words. “This had better not…

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  • The Last Sunday

    The Last Sunday of Summer Today is the last Sunday of summer. I go back to school tomorrow. A whole new ride starts. I didn’t think about it until yesterday. God, I hate giving up summer.  I became a writer this summer. Being a writer gives you permission to stay home and write. In fact,…

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  • Funding

    “Thank you, Ms. Parsons.” I handed the officer my drivers’ license and registration as the window rolled down. I swear I came to a full stop at the stop sign. He read my name from the license and smiled at me. I wondered if he thought I looked like a criminal. My black car was…

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  • Garden Success

    All gardens need a boy.

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  • Party for One

    Image generated with AI. Betwixt the tantalizing mushrooms and truffles, I teleported through the chocolates. That was the only way to get through them unscathed. I would eat my weight in  chocolate without a muzzle. Against chocolate, especially the 83% cacao, I had no defense. It tantalized me from the other room, I could hear… Read more

  • Garden Luncheon

    Margaret took off her gardening gloves and surveyed her garden. The flowers were perfect. Never had her blooms been bigger or brighter than they were this summer. She took out her phone to take a picture. The blues, oranges, and reds were just phenomenal. She picked a blue one and took it into the house… Read more

  • Barefoot Drama

    Image generated with AI. May first is Legal Barefoot Day. The day that my sister and brother and I were allowed to go outside without shoes and not get in trouble for it. Grass stains and bee stings were the worst that could happen to us. Mom would scrub our feet raw every night in… Read more

  • Janet and Miranda Have Lunch

    Artist unknown. “Everything on this menu must have at least ten thousand calories,” Miranda said as she picked up her Chardonnay. Janet thought by the looks of her, she could use ten thousand calories. She could get a salad or a steak anywhere. But they were in an exquisite Indian restaurant that served the best… Read more

  • Climbing the Rope

    Image generated with AI. Emmy fumed. She’d been struggling to climb that rope for three weeks and still hadn’t made it two feet off the ground. Her face was red, her hands burned, her thighs chafed. She headed to the dreaded locker room to change, so she could hear more jeers from the cheer leaders… Read more

  • The Odd

    Sometimes, the odd is a catalyst for transcendence. Incessant noise and chatter become too much in everyday life and I want to lash out and run into a meadow of wildflowers and ferns, seek shelter in an old shed and call it a day. Call it a life.  The closer I get to reality, the… Read more

  • Local Pizza

    Local Pizza I’m lucky. I live in small town West Virginia and a half a mile from a glorious, honest to God Italian pizza parlor, Larobi’s Pizza. The only Italian place this side of Ona that’s not a chain. Larobi’s takes cash and they don’t deliver. Their dining room is almost as good as their…

    Read more

  • If I’m alive

    If I’m alive… In twenty years, If I’m still alive I hope to hell I finally graduated from school. Kids have always liked me, not the other way round. This is the last twenty. Fix it. Admit it, I’m sick of kids.  I’ll publish the definitive legend of how the Scottish play got its curse…

    Read more

  • Ten Mile Light

    “Out, out brief candle,” I said. “Shakespeare is so antiquated. They’re taking him out of the schools now. He’s irrelevant,” said Nick. My son was six. “Can you tell a story in a thousand words or less in iambic pentameter? I didn’t think so.”  “Just tell me a bedtime story,” he said. “It was a…

    Read more

  • Adult Kids

    Adult Children A nurse in the doctor’s office ran me out of the room when the twins got their vaccinations to start school. They started crying the minute Dr. Brick said, “You know I would never do anything that would hurt without telling you.” They got five shots. Two in one leg, three in the…

    Read more

  • Flash and Trash

    When Mom died, I became keeper of the jewelry box. I dole out the contents to the various family members before I die. It’s not the standard little white padded jewelry box with the little gold lock and filigree. It’s the Chrysler Building of all jewelry boxes. Its contents are extraordinary. The most valuable commercial…

    Read more

  • Famous Diner

    Famous Diner I didn’t think Shakespeare would show up for dinner, not the real one anyway. He’d been dead for four hundred and six years. My research for a novel featuring the bard had me making a basic English roast dinner, including a bad Yorkshire pudding. Those things are tricky. When I make them, they…

    Read more

  • Intro…

    “It’s jacked up. Nobody consulted me about a standard damned poodle coming into this house. Life was just fine. It’s jacked up as shit,” said Norris. He stomped in a circle and thumped his tail before he could compose himself to continue. He was too damned mad. Norris was without words. “This had better not…

    Read more

  • The Last Sunday

    The Last Sunday of Summer Today is the last Sunday of summer. I go back to school tomorrow. A whole new ride starts. I didn’t think about it until yesterday. God, I hate giving up summer.  I became a writer this summer. Being a writer gives you permission to stay home and write. In fact,…

    Read more

  • Funding

    “Thank you, Ms. Parsons.” I handed the officer my drivers’ license and registration as the window rolled down. I swear I came to a full stop at the stop sign. He read my name from the license and smiled at me. I wondered if he thought I looked like a criminal. My black car was…

    Read more

  • Garden Success

    All gardens need a boy.

    Read more


  • On Writing; Inspired by Erma Bombeck

    “I’ve taken my typewriter to the hospital with me for kidney infections. I have taken it on camping trips, and the sand has gotten in the keys. It is just like the most fierce habit you can imagine. It is there, and it stares at you like a conscience.” ~ Erma Bombeck I must write.…

  • The Mystery in the Cook Book

    I pulled the book off the shelves that looked most promising for a real recipe for rough puff pastry. The Great British Baking Show offered more inspiration than information, and Wolfgang Puck’s book looked more promising than most on the St. Albans library shelves. The book held that exquisite new book smell to it, and…

  • Teachers’ Kids

    “Out, out brief candle,” I said. “Shakespeare is so antiquated. They’re taking him out of the schools now. He’s irrelevant,” said Nick. My son was six. “Can you tell a story in a thousand words or less in iambic pentameter? I didn’t think so.”  “Just tell me a bedtime story,” he said. “It was a…

  • Black Licorice

    “Which house shall we hit next, the brick one or that long white one with just the porch light on?” The Bunny Sisters collaborated. Trick or Treat was a serious matter. It had to be done in the most efficient and interesting of ways. Their costumes were fashioned of dresses from the thirties and their…

  • An Unlikely Account of Lincoln’s Tophat

    Not many people knew of Mercucio Sibedow, haberdasher to the presidency. Mercucio grew up south of the Mason Dixon line. He learned from his daddy how to make hats and ties, leather gloves, fashion mens finishing touches. You’d think that finishing touches were woman’s work, but that would be absolutely not true. In the world…